I’m super sensitive when it comes to the relationship that I share with my dad. Sometimes I cry when I’m just thinking about it. It really breaks my heart because I feel like everything I do or how I’m growing up breaks his. I was always daddy’s girl when I was a kid and as I grew older we grew distant. Honestly, I think it’s because I’m scared of him. I’m scared to let him down. I’m scared to get into trouble with him. I’m scared to have heart to hearts with him. I’m scared to be too close to him. But I try so hard, so damn hard to make him proud, to stay out of his way, to stay on his good side. I swear I’ve never tried so hard for somebody in my life. I just feel like no matter what I do or how well I’m doing I always end up letting him down. I feel like there’s always going to be something wrong with me, and I just feel really low because of that. I feel like a messed up daughter because I’ve made stupid decisions or I didn’t grow up the way he imagined me to be. I wish he could just see that I try, I try my best with all that I have just for him. And I wish he knew that even through our worst fights I love him more than anything and any man in my life.

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